Order of Man

There seems to be a lot of men these days that have either forgotten what it means to be a man in the home or never learned the skills to step up fully as the king of the castle. I look around and I see the pain in men's eyes. And, if it's not pain, it's death. There are millions of men walking around like lifeless, soulless zombies. And, the repercussions of that is at best a meaningless life and, at worst, infidelity issues, addiction to drugs, alcohol, and pornography, and, in many case, verbal, emotional, and physical abuse. While everyone out there is trying to change the world, solve world hunger, bring about world peace, and doing it at a global scale, I'm here to tell you that the way we change the world by equipping men with the tools and skills to lead their own kingdoms. And that means we start by going into the most basic unit in society, the family. http://www.orderofman.com/FFN059 http://www.orderofman.com

11:05 6/9/2017

Past Episodes

In October of 2016, Todd Orr was hiking in the mountains of Montana when he spotted a grizzly bear. He made eye contact and the bear ran off with her cubs over a crest in the distance. Only a few minutes later, Todd turned around to find the bear charging towards him. He pulled out his bear spray, fired, then collapsed as he found himself in a life and death struggle against a grizzly bear. Not only did Todd survive, on his way back to his vehicle, he was attacked by the same bear again in a second life or death struggle. www.orderofman.com/FFN077 Please leave us a rating and review!
27:56 10/13/2017
At times, we tend to get into our own heads and become our own worst enemies. We often write off anyone who happens to disagree with us, puts us down in any way, and label them as "haters." But it's our natural tendency - especially as high achieving men - to be our harshest critics. It's valuable at times and drives us to do great things and, other times, it creates unnecessary barriers to our success. My guest today, Gary John Bishop, author of Unfu*ck Yourself joins me to talk about how to redefine yourself by becoming unrealistic, how to uncover the narratives we tell ourselves, the difference between knowing something and being aware of something, and how to get out of your head and into your life.? ?SHOW HIGHLIGHTS? How to get out of your head How to develop a no-nonsense approach to life The critical difference between affirmations and personal assertions Why self-help is inferior to self-development and growth How to uncover the narratives you tell yourself Understanding the study of Oncology and how it applies to your growth The difference between being wrong and being inaccurate How to become more present in your life The power of telling yourself you're an asshole Why we should not concern ourselves with the past and the future The difference between knowing something and being aware of something How to redefine yourself by being unrealistic How to interrupt the notion of who you already are? ? GARY JOHN BISHOP Gentlemen, my guest today is Gary John Bishop. He is a personal development expert and the author of Unfu*ck Yourself - which is a book I just picked up to read a couple weeks ago. In reading it, I can appreciate Gary's no-nonsense approach to human development, and high-powered mentoring. And, I knew right away I had to get him on the show. He's worked with top athletes and Fortune 500 executives in his personal development career. This guy is real. He's raw. He tells it like it is and pulls no punches which is exactly what we, as men, might just need in order to come to some realizations about our own lives, how to get out of our own heads, and out of our own way. Please leave us a review at http://orderofman.com/itunes Shownotes: http://orderofman.com/134 Website: http://orderofman.com
47:01 10/10/2017
Everywhere you turn you'll find another "motivational guru" attempting to inspire the masses to take action. If you're like me, you've attended conferences, purchased courses, and poured over endless quotes and memes in a feeble attempt to get motivated enough to do what you already know you should be doing. Don't get me wrong, there's nothing particularly wrong with motivation, other than it doesn't last. We've all left that conference feeling inspired only to get back into the grind and lose the excitement within 24-48 hours. Like a drug-user hooked on cocaine, we're constantly on the lookout for the next conference that promises to inspire, amaze, and motivate us yet again. We go. We spend the time, the energy, and the money. And, we even get motivated for another 24-48 hours, until our next fix is needed. And that's the problem. We become dependent when we seek motivation from outside sources. And those that host these conferences know that and bank on the fact that you'll have to come back next year. I'm not suggesting you don't attend these motivational conferences. I'm encouraging you to dig deeper than the surface-level B.S. that seems to be so prevalent in today's society. But rather than beat my chest and shout a catchy little tagline that "Motivation is B.S.", let me share five strategies you can start using today to become your own source of inspiration and, more importantly, action. PLANT YOUR FLAG We live in a world where everything is promised immediately. Through Amazon, you can be reading a book I recommend in the next couple minutes. We're promised immediate results from the latest fat-loss hack. Even podcast like this one allow us to listen to any subject on demand free from any need to wait for or on anyone. In most cases, this access to information, products, and services is a beautiful thing. The unintended consequence, however, is that our attention span and patience has been greatly diminished. That's too bad considering that your success in any area of life requires an insane amount of consistency over long periods of time. If you're looking for immediate results in your life, motivation might just cut it. But if you're interested in maintaining a healthy, wealthy, and successful life, you're going to have to wrap your head around taking action for a lifetime. BE A MAN OF YOUR WORD Planting your flag requires you to be a man of your word. If, for example, you've committed to working out 5 days a week, every day you miss makes you a liar - to put it bluntly. Sure, we can sugarcoat it and make excuses for why we missed our workouts but at the end of the day, you did not do what you said you would and that, by definition, makes you less than a man of your word. It's a good thing then that the idea of doing what you say you will is a skill set that can be learned. All it takes is effort and consistency. Even the smallest of task and the smallest of promises count. If you tell your wife you're going to take out the trash, take out the trash. If you tell your son you're going to play catch with him after school, play catch with him after school. If you tell a neighbor you'll be there to help him move, be there on time to help him move. Every time you fail to keep your word, a little piece of your soul dies. It's no wonder then why so many men seem to be miserable. They can't keep their promises to themselves, let alone to others. When you wake up early in the morning to work out, don't question whether or not you should. Question whether or not you're going to be a man of your word today. After all, the promises you make to yourself are the most important you can make. SYSTEMS AND PROCESSES Part of being a man of your word is about creating systems and processes to ensure you are. Let's use the workout example again. If you tell yourself you're going to work out in the morning, set your clothes out the night before, get your pre-workout drink ready, and know what your workout is going to be. These are three simple systems that will keep you on track when you don't want to be on track. Calendars, daily rituals, evening routines, task lists, electronic reminders, Field Notes journals, coaching, and masterminds are all examples of systems and processed you can implement to get your work done. REVIEW YOUR PROGRESS Out of all the systems we could talk about, I want to focus on the idea of reviewing your progress. Most men don't. We tend to identify the task, do it (or don't), then move right to the next task. This process of reviewing your actions, conversations, projects, interactions, and day is a critical component of diving deeper than simply being motivated. I learned the after-action review in the military which is a series of five questions you can ask yourself to review your work and get you pointed in the right direction every day. For the sake of time, I'm not going to share the questions but if you're interested, you can get a copy of the After-Action Review at www.orderofman.com/afteractionreview. DISCIPLINE TRUMPS MOTIVATION After all is said and done, the mantra that discipline trumps motivation has been a huge help for me. Motivation is external. Discipline is internal. We rely on outside sources when we seek after motivation. We depend on ourselves when we strive for discipline. This is what makes discipline so powerful. We simple decide that we're going to be disciplined rather than wait for the perfect set of variables to motivate and inspire. When you're struggling to get out of bed, or workout, or be consistent with the project at work or in school, remember and tell yourself, "discipline trumps motivation" or as Jocko would say, "Discipline equals freedom." Internalize it, get a bracelet that says it, tattoo it on your forehead if you have to but whatever you do life your life by the words, "discipline trumps motivation." This is not an overnight process, especially if you've been relying others to motivate you most of your life but remember to plant your flag, be a man of your word, develop systems and processes, review your progress, and live your life by the mantra, "discipline trumps motivation" and you'll never want - or need - for motivation again. www.orderofman.com/FFN076 Please leave us a rating and review!
12:41 10/6/2017
Every single one of has fallen a time or two in life. And, everyone of us knows a man who has failed to get back up from that fall. It's not an easy thing to overcome the wounds of failure, but if we want to thrive, it's a requirement. My guest today, Champion Muay Thai Fighter Chris Romulo, joins me to talk about finding the fight in us, the difference between ego and confidence, living by the mantra, "Fall seven times, stand up eight," and how to develop the fighter's mindset. SHOW HIGHLIGHTS * What is the "Champions Uprising" * The fight that changed everything for Chris * How to find your rhythm and flow in life * Why timing is critical * The importance of settling into life * How to change your mindset * How to find the fight in us * The difference between complacency and getting comfortable * How to overcome the pushback * How to develop of fighter's mindset * 7 factors of an uprising * The difference between ego and confidence * Living by the mantra, "Fall seven times, stand up eight"? CHRIS ROMULO Gentlemen, I am stoked to be introducing you to my guest today, Chris Romulo. You're going to hear how impressive this man is in my interview today but you're also going to hear the humility that has turned Chris into a champion multiple times over.?? Chris is a 6-time Muay Thai champion, and the author of his new book, Champions Uprising.??He is also a fighting coach and the owner of CROM fitness where he teaches men and boys the how to fight, develop grit and determination, and the fighter's mindset both inside the ring and out. Please leave us a review at http://orderofman.com/itunes Shownotes: http://orderofman.com/133 Website: http://orderofman.com
42:43 10/3/2017
I typically like to frame these discussions in a positive perspective but I do think it's important that we occasionally look at the other side. Most people are more than willing to talk about what will make a man a success and, while I agree that's an important subject to cover, just as important is the discussion of what is going to keep you from accomplishing what you want. So today, in an attempt to keep you from falling into some of the same traps this humble man has fallen into a time or two, I'll share with you 6 reasons why men fail and, in doing so, help you find a new path to thriving in what we call the Quadrants (yourself, your relationships, your health, and your wealth). PRIDE COMES BEFORE THE FALL The number one reason most men fail, and the reason I fail from time to time is pride. I've talked about it before but we have been led to believe that if you don't have the answer, you're an idiot or less of a man. It's unfortunate that's the case because it drives us to go at it alone, to figure out things the hard way, and to struggle, when all we really have to do is reach out to someone who may know a few things more than we do. The solution is simple: recognize you don't have it all figured out and ask for help from someone who does. Want to get in shape? Ask someone what you should do to get in shape. Want a promotion? Ask someone to help you with the project that will help you secure your promotion. Want to shore up the relationship with your wife? Ask someone who has a great relationship. The solution, again, is ask. Humble yourself and reach out YOU DON'T HAVE AN INFORMATION PROBLEM; YOU HAVE A DISCIPLINE PROBLEM When I started Order of Man in early 2015, I knew there wasn't a lot of new information I could share with men. But what I recognized is that information isn't really the problem. You have access to more information in the palm of your hand than the most educated minds had a hundred years ago. Information isn't the problem. Action (or lack thereof) is. And, more specifically, sustained action. Motivation doesn't cut it. Accountability doesn't cut it. The only thing that will yield the results your after is consistent action towards your objective. When that alarm goes off in the wee hours of the morning, it's time to fight. It's time to engage. It's time to battle. All you need is to DECIDE. FEAR IS YOUR ENEMY We've all heard the acronym F.E.A.R. (False Evidence Appearing Real). I disagree. Fear is real. It's designed to keep you alive. Running from the things that scare you, or worse, pretending it doesn't exist will not get you closer to your goal. Facing the enemy that is fear will. When you're scared, acknowledge it. Recognize it for what it is and use the fear to equip and arm yourself with the tools, mindset, skill set, and resources to look it in the eye and drive on. It's likely that the thing you fear the most won't kill you. It's simply going to make you feel a little uncomfortable. Be okay with that. Discomfort is your friend, fear is your enemy. ACTING FOR ACCEPTANCE In my experience, one of the biggest dangers we fall into is trying to be accepted by others. The way we run our marriages, our businesses, our workouts, and our lives is so centered around what other people think. I know personally there have been times in my life where I've wondered whose life am I living. The answer is someone else's. We're constantly bombarded by stimuli from magazines and books, to this podcast and mainstream media. And, we believe that the way one person does it is the way we should do it. Add to that the environment of political correctness in which we live and you're likely to withhold the way you really feel or alter your message or actions based on the perceived criticism you'll receive from others. If you truly want to thrive, you'll work on overcoming what other people think about you. EXCUSES ARE LIES Regardless of how you choose to paint it, the excuses you craft are nothing more than cleverly disguised lies. And, what's worse is you've been lying to yourself for so long that you're actually starting to believe your own B.S. When something doesn't go according to plan, I'd encourage you to say, "This didn't go well because I did or didn't ____________." Sure, there may be other people that have a part to play in the failure of your objective but there's nothing you can do about another human being - only yourself. SITTING THE SIDELINES The excuses you tell yourself lead into the last point I want to make with you today. Because you've been feeding yourself lies, it's caused you to stop in your tracks. It's caused you to question your ability to drive on and maybe even your desire to do so. The reason a lot of men fail is because they're so concerned with all the other reasons I shared with you today at the expense of the very action that will help them succeed in the first place. If you want to thrive, you need to take action. You're probably going to mess up. You're probably going to fall short. People are probably going to mock you. So what? You can fail at your objective so no one sees you misstep or you can struggle for a little while until you're able to achieve what it is you're after. Let's recap these again: pride comes before the fall, you don't have an information problem; you have an action problem, fear is your enemy, acting for acceptance, excuses are lies, and sitting the sideline. I know these factors aren't easy to overcome. I struggle against them every day. But the times when I've been the happiest, most successful, and most content in my life is when I've recognized what I'm against and overcome them anyways. www.orderofman.com/FFN075 Please leave us a rating and review!
11:36 9/29/2017
Someone asked me several weeks ago, "If you could have one super power, what would it be?" To which I responded, "The ability to read people's minds." As it turns out one doesn't need to be a superhero in order to possess the ability to understand what other people are thinking and, to a degree, use that knowledge to produce desired outcomes. My guest today, the founder of Ellipsis Behavior Laboratories and the author of The Ellipses Manuel, joins me to talk about reading body language and thoughts, becoming a human lie detector, how to activate trust in others, and how to decode and decipher human behavior. CHASE HUGHES Chase Hughes (@thechasehughes) is a Navy veteran and an author and speaker on behavior analysis, body language and behavior engineering. He founded Ellipsis Behavior Laboratories in 2011 and has since developed the Behavioral Table of Elements which, after pouring over this, is probably the most extensive behavioral analysis tool I've ever seen. Chase is also the creator of other life-saving systems such as 'The Hostile Hospital' and 'Tactical Psychology'. And, if that's not enough, Chase is also in the process of developing new programs for the US Government. He volunteers his skills by training members of anti-human trafficking teams around the world and has published two books on human behavior and over 29 articles and papers on behavior and behavior analysis. Chase Hughes is here today to talk about the concepts from his new book, The Ellipsis Manual: Analysis and Engineering of Human Behavior. Please leave us a review at http://orderofman.com/itunes Shownotes: http://orderofman.com/132 Website: http://orderofman.com
43:14 9/26/2017
What exactly is "The Drift?" The Drift is the natural tendency we have as men to coast, and in a way, take our hands off the steering wheel of life and allow ourselves to be controlled and put ourselves at the mercy of all that life offers. The fact is that there are forces at work against us that keep us from accomplishing what we truly want in life and, unless, we're actively engaged in the process of intentionally living our lives, it's very easy for us to get off course. Today, I'm going to share with you why this happens but, more importantly, 3 measures you can take to ensure you maintain the course you are meant to maintain. www.orderofman.com/FFN074 www.orderofman.com
10:46 9/22/2017
Everywhere you turn, you'll find men living what I call the sedated life. Like robots on an assembly line, these men wake up at the same time, eat the same food for breakfast, drive to work the same way every day, do the same menial tasks for 8-9 hours, drive home, kiss the wife and kids, eat dinner, watch some TV, go to bed, and do it all over again. My guest today, former Navy SEAL and wingsuit base-jumper Andy Stumpf is the exact opposite of that. And, while we can't all be Navy SEALs, jump of really high mountains and structures, and travel the distance of 18 miles in a wingsuit, we can all take some calculated risks that make us feel alive. Today we talk about finding something worth fighting for, eliminating emotions in the decision-making process, why people fail in the application of their goals, and how to live life on the edge.?? ANDY STUMPF Andy Stumpf (@andystumpf77) is a former Navy SEAL with SEAL Team Five and later joining the most elite counter-terrorism unit in the military, SEAL Team Six.? He is also 5.11 and Black Rifle Coffee Company sponsored athlete, and has an affinity for jumping off really tall mountains and perfectly good airplanes. As impressive as that sounds, he refers to himself as a "professional gravity enthusiast" and rightfully so. He's completed wingsuit jumps lasting more that 18 miles at speeds of 161 mph. He is the recipient of 5 Bronze Star Medals (four with valor), the Purple Heart, the Joint Service Commendation Medal, the Navy and Marine Corp Commendation Medal with Valor, three Navy and Marine Corp Achievement Medals, and two Combat Action Ribbons. In other words, the man is a genuine Bad-A and today's he's here to talk about living life on the edge. Please leave us a review at http://orderofman.com/itunes Shownotes: http://orderofman.com/131 Website: http://orderofman.com
43:01 9/19/2017
I think it's safe to assume by now that you probably - at least to some degree - understand that having a coach is such a valuable strategy towards becoming great, whether that's improving your golf swing, enhancing your public speaking skills, building a solid relationship with your wife, or growing your business. But, it amazes me how often men recognize the value of coaching in elite performers yet underestimate the power of having a coach even if you're not at the elite level or competing on the global stage. Today I talk about why you should consider hiring a coach and what to look for. www.orderofman.com/FFN073 www.orderofman.com
13:13 9/15/2017
If you're anything like me, you are what I refer to as a "starter." I've never been at a loss for figuring out how to start things. Getting things done is a completely different story. Today I am joined by New York Times Bestselling author, Jon Acuff. If you have a problem with finishing what you start, this is the episode for you and, I'm not going to lie, I needed this one more than most. We talk about the developing a tolerance for imperfection, why "strategic incompetence" is a powerful tool, how to overcome what Jon calls "noble obstacles," a new spin on SMART goals, and how to finally finish what you started. Jon Acuff Guys, I am so stoked to be introducing you to my guest today, Mr. Jon Acuff. I've read all four of his books and I've been trying to get him on the show for two years. The time finally came with the release of his new book today (if you're listening to this the day it is being released), Finish: Give Yourself the Gift of Done. The other books I've read are Do Over, Start, and Quitter. All of which have been instrumental in helping me launch the podcast you're listening to right now. He's a New York Times Bestselling Author. He's worked with companies like Home Depot, Staples, and The Dave Ramsey Team. He's been featured on CNN, Fox News, and other major media outlets. This guy is intelligent, he's funny, and he's here to drop some serious knowledge on the art, science, and skill of finishing what you start. Please leave us a review at http://orderofman.com/itunes Shownotes: http://orderofman.com/130 Website: http://orderofman.com
42:00 9/12/2017

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